Rawr. I got my Macroecons & Programming Ct pprs back on Mon! I think i did okay-

Programming -75/100
Macroecons - 14/20

I could've gotten 18 for econs! When we went through the ppr I realised that I actually selected the correct answers for 2 questions worth 2 points each, and then decided against them for the wrong answers.

-.-"

how clever right.

Lionel's right though,it was a good effort. I think the reason why I felt a little...urm. Disappointed? Lousy? I dont know... I cant think of a word to describe it.I just felt a little thrashy even after wy texted me about my accounting ppr- and it didnt show, one of those feelings you could suppress and throw on a smile to face the world with.Im dealing with it though, all through the week god's been showing me what it really meant to trust him.When things dont turn out the way we want them to, even when things are falling apart.Yup, he's still in control-we just dont see it. But that's just us- we need to see to believe, and so most of us dont see past tomorrow, who knows what the future holds for us? We spend our efforts on today,living in hope and anticipation for tomorrow,that it'll get better, that our feet will take us further. What happens when our plans fail us? Put your trust in the right places- when you knw and understand who ure trusting it becomes easier to pick yourself up after a fall, because you can count on a hand to always be stretched out to lift you up.

Thank god IAC & LMS projects were not due this wk! And that we're finally getting somewhere. HAHA.Switching to wordpress soon! Im thinking this wknd.

Anyway here's a rly swwwwwt song i rmb singing during chapel &/ or assembly back in SAJS.

HEH!

Take a listen!

For those of you who learn econs.
heh :D

Purchasing Power : (In Gifford's dictionary)The ability to buy (1) shades (2) sleeveless tops (3) Berms (4) Fossil Watch (5) Skinny Jeans (6) Skinny Tie (7) Belt (8) Canvas Shoes (9) Running Shoes (10) PSP ... the list goes on.
Purchasing Power : ( In god's dictionary) The ability to buy our love and undivided attention-it came at a high cost. He had to send His son as payment for OUR sins. Now you know how much you're worth?

STORMcity!;
- 1:04 PM

My heart is dry but still im singing

I trip and fall but still im living

Who knows what the future holds

But God to you i'll ever hold so close

To you a new song we'll sing

In our hearts take your place as king

We're broken and weak

But god in our lives will your work complete

woah,how time flies.

Haha yeah, my cousin's 21 today, so here's a shoutout going to Ben,to his first steps into the world of adulthood. awww. :D HAHAHAHA. alrrrright man. heh. that's four years to go for me,next up in line. what will 21 hold for me, i wonderr.haha.right now though im making plans for 18 so here's an advanced invitation, those of you reading, whoever you are- keep yourselves free on the 10th of April 2008-please? hahaha. Anyway Jolene, my lil cousin of 3, she's incredibly cute! effing funny. heh!

School re-opens this monday, as much as i dont feel like going back to routine & such, i know i have to. As much as everything inside me says 'gifford you know nothing's gonna change, you're a fire that will be quickly snuffed out because you're in all the wrong places at all the wrong times.'- i know it's time for a change. Its gonna be difficult-hell yeah. but god's with me.

I should stop sleeping this late,you know.

It'll take a world war to wake me up for 9am classes. LOL.

Night folks. Or is it morning. whichever, im lazy to think. hows that sound. HAHHAHA. lame.

STORMcity!;
- 1:52 AM

Cluster Camp Reflection

I think what I caught from this year’s cluster camp is a practical equipping experience from the lord to be a spiritual father, I could feel that right from the beginning, the lord was putting the love that I had, the love that wants to see my friend come to Christ,the love to see my brothers grow stronger in the lord, to the test. How desperately did I want that?

Desperation was the key.

And that was just what id asked the lord for, going into this camp! I was thirsty, craving for the lord to come and fill me again with a greater measure of his spirit to love the people around me. It’s not easy, you & I both know that its nothing to love the lovable, but I think god has been constantly challenging my love for the “unlovable” as well!

Being a superstar, not by the world’s standards, because god’s standards are way higher than that, and yet…What amazes me is how we can fight to meet the world’s standards and fail but we’re exactly how god likes us, nothing short! We set expectations on others and even ourselves, and the unfortunate conclusion is that the greater the expectation, the greater the risk of disappointment- but that’s not how it is with god! God’s love overlooks our imperfections, He is perfect YET easily pleased!

God doesn’t set any expectations in loving us, giving us His all but expecting nothing in return except that we love him with all we are too. So what gives us any right to do that with others?

I know he’s working in my life even now, teaching me how to love just as he did!

Lord I know I’ll falter, but even then- your hand is steady and firm, a gentle yet powerful reminder that you first loved me and because of that, I can love me for me and others for who they are, though we are imperfect- but god you take delight in our imperfections,through which you can be made perfect. So I pray that in you we will stand tall, your people will not be silent- like a city on a hill,we cannot hide! We will not hide, so let us burn bright. Amen.


‘You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden.Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on it’s stand,and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way let your light shine before men,that they may see your good deeds and praise your father in heaven.’ Matthew 5:14-16

STORMcity!;
- 3:00 PM

I was on the bus home one evening when a friend of mine texted me, apparently troubled & confused,he knows how he's feeling, doesnt like it one bit, but he didnt know how to deal with his emotions,whatever was affecting him, was affecting him really bad.
After every effort at consolation & cheering him up, i suddenly had a clear mental of picture of what all of it really pointed to.
Let's look at it this way.


Individual X = has a set of emotions to which he is reacting to a situation = a set of thoughts, actions, & speech = Individual Y

Yup, that's how the world works, my friend. Consciously or not, we run on our emotions, they affect our relationship with others, who just like us, are running this race we call life, its our own race, not a race to finish first, by the way, HAHAH.okay lame. but yeah, our emotions dont just affect us whether we like it or not, they affect other people as well somewhere along the way.Ever asked yourself why that boring math teacher screamed in your face for not handing in your assignment on time, and how you felt like punching him/her after tht? well,

Gifford = Bored = She's boring,why bother to listen anyway? Assignment? What assignment? + Inaction (doesnt do hwk -.- ) + "cher, got homework meh?" = 'Cher" = Pissed, frustrated, disappointed = He didnt do my work! Again! + Screams at Gifford + " You &*@#&! Get it done before five or i'll phone your parents and you'll be sorry!

Point taken?

one thing leads to another because we fail to look at what really affects us, it aint the people,well,not really,it all starts out because we feel the way we do, think the way we do, which leads to an action, and the whole cycle sorta repeats itself.And it will continue to, untill you do something about it. What causes you to react the way you do, i suggest, is your heart. So what's the condition of your heart today?
The heart is the key to all human relationships. You see, there is always a tendancy to love people the way we are loved by others, to work with your team the way your team leader used to work with you, etc, etc. In the same way, because we first tasted and experienced god's love in our lives, we should love people the way he loves us! there's a reason why i used 'should' here.

Because there are the exceptional few who break out of this chain,it could work postively or negatively.

say your group project leader doesnt work well with his/her team, you dont like the way he leads the team, if you do something about it and learn from this mistake, you might be a better leader when the time comes!

These are agents of change in a world where people are constantly caught in routine, routines that take them nowhere at the end of the day because they dont do anything about their situation. These are people who can, and will make a difference.

But there are others who also break out of the chain where god's love is concerned, and if they dont do anything about it, they'll fall out, the rest is history.

God never set any expectations in loving us, he just does!

So what gives you the right to set any expectations of yourself and the ones you love?

If thats what ure doing, if thats what you think you're doing, then maybe ure just not doing it right.

STORMcity!;
- 11:37 PM

There are 3 types of people caught in a tight spot.

#1 Thinks and seriously believes that their problems are way bigger thn they are,resign with the convenient excuse that it's just too much for them to deal with.

#2 Thinks that they are bigger thn their problems(no kidding!) so why bother? urm. yeah. every predicament is a chance at glory, untill they meet complacency.

#3 Doesnt think, thats what makes the third type of people a cut above the rest. They know with their heart and soul that god doesnt bring them to what he cannot bring them through. Your problems are as big as you are.

It isnt easy to see that when ure up against something that washes right through you and leaves you drained and cringing in fear at what might happen next- then again... the end of you is where god begins, & untill then, all its ever gonna be is just you, you, miserable you.

Where IS the end of you? I dont know, some people say its when they think they're stripped of their ability to deal with their problems,this is it- youve got me, we're good.

Id like to suggest that you dont need to be hit with a major issue pointing towards *hrm!* death before god can take over, because you were dead way earlier thn you think! it was then which you surrendered your life at the cross, it was also then which you acknowledged that you were completely unable, that was the end of you, that was where god has started his work, and rest assured, he will finish it- thats life for you,right there.

:D

STORMcity!;
- 5:46 PM

Say a little Prayer,put these worries to rest
It'll get better,this is but a test
Frustration plagues me,yet i know
This heart is not going to turn cold.

STORMcity!;
- 4:57 PM

A dependable shoulder to lean on to comfort troubled souls
A firm encouragement when failure tears down and frustration shows
You stand with us to laugh and cry
When we're taken by fear,when we even feel like we're about to die
You're a steady hand holding us quietly but firmly
When life shakes us ever so violently

we dont say this enough- but though we dont always understand your pain
You can count on us to be praying that in your life, god will always rule and reign
For all the love coming out of a selfless heart
Your sons,from your side will never depart.

As I know You- Gifford

to all who have been a father to me, and still are... thank you.

Happy Dad's. (:

ohh if you dont already know, i love writing. :D but i havent read a book from start to finish since, since...see,i dont even remember when! LOL. that's sad really! there's just way too many things that ive either wanted to do but havent,or set out to do but never finished.rest assured, i know its time for a change, and im gonna do something about it. haha.

STORMcity!;
- 11:27 PM

The inability to change your circumstance, the lack of control over your predicament, the futility of fighting your way out of a tight spot. frustration plagues you, empties you, changes you. we get tired of watching our backs, we're overwhelmed by the things and people life puts along our way.

beneath this exterior lies a heart that, at every beat fears it'll grow colder by the second.

im frustrated.that i have done almost nothing productive during the first out of two weeks of the mid-term break.that i. that i. that i.

fight back gifford, you know its what you were meant to do all this time,you know its gonna be tough as hell but you know what you're fighting for,who, and why.

you could use a little of your own advice every now and then,you know.

STORMcity!;
- 2:11 AM

Lionel and Terry's guys headed over to Nigel's place for an informal outing on monday... and boy we had buckets and buckets of fun... Nigel's really got the works man. a pool table, an xbox console, 3 or 4 guitars excluding the one that BJN brought? haha yeah so activities included those just mentioned along with a truckload of crap coming from people we'd never expect *points* and you *points* and... well, look how far we've come now. haha. it aint too long since none of us talked to each other for any longer thn 10 minutes, and there we were, things felt that much different. we had dinner @ chomp chomp,forked out like all my assets, but hey, it was all good la.heh.

caught ocean's 13 on tues with zu,brandon,daryl,louis and jon. urrrrrrr. it was alright i think, not a blast,nothing unexpected, pretty much the same witty humour,this time hinging round a plot for revenge. id rate it 3 out of 5! oh that was after the interview for ba society with clem and feli, which i think went okay... i was surprisingly all calm and cool about it, i dont know why either. hahahaha. we didnt jam, peanut butter or kaya! okay we didnt go jamming. -.- but CS made up for that. (: the noob made a little comeback with the second top frag, beating a personal record. he'd never hit that in one hour of cs ever in his life. so here's a toast, noob's leveled up. HAHHAHAHA. (X

did something crazy today. traded sleep for it, lost some spiritual ground there as well. which im working to take back. i know im being tested, i know. so you might have got me there satan, but dont get all smug on me. its too early.

oooh double shot coffee saved my life, haha one whole day without sleep, i could have just rolled over and died. hahaha. so thankgod for caffein, headed over to darren's house to do a little work and slack for abit before heading out to prayer meet.

Argh the ravages of time forces me to leave you so abruptly,heading out for dinner and choir prac-read me up tmw! will update!

STORMcity!;
- 5:02 PM

Cluster Camp

there were some really intense struggles and battles leading up to cluster camp, as always. since lionel lao pa(daddy in chinese)’s absence I could see that we were all losing our way and coming under heavy fire from the devil,one by one we were being tested, and one by one, we were caught off-guard,defenses down. like,say, when I barge into the cubicle when you are peeing, go for your shorts and run away with your cell phone or something. Clear enough? HAHHA x) what would you do, in that situation?

You see,the issue here points to one thing- contingency plan. Need I say more? what im talking about is not an attempt by the flesh to anticipate and prepare, but the condition of our hearts, do we always know who we can count on when the going gets tough, before we’re busted wide open do we know who will stand with us and protect us? do we know who we can trust? When we’re being tested ,how aware are we of the need to rmb who that is? well I think one thing to be thankful for here is the time whn bjorn liu actually suggested we meet up as a cell even while lionel is not around and darren actually set out to plan for this time together where we just prayed,for ourselves,for the people we were bringing,and for the camp. and god came through (:
this year’s CC is different from last year. for those of you who were around for last year’s you’ll know what im talking about.not giving a review so I’ll just share about what camp was like for me. I think I came with a heart that desperately wanted to seek god, to be broken and shaped and trained as a spiritual father. thats veh veh veh veh xin ku you know! hahaha! it aint easy! but I think that was me just asking big. bjorn liu stayed over before camp and we actually spent the whole night up talking. hahaha.
so that’s what it was, god training bjorn,darren,brandon and I,putting us to the test.

I know I was tested. haha.

Oooh hey. On a lighter note, my brotherrrrrrs! (: one of the things id prayed for was tht we would stand as one in the love tht has called us together because that’s gonna piss satan real bad I know he’s gon cry for his mommy. and yeah, its amazing how god has answered that prayer. but we’re just starting out now so let’s all build god’s establishment properly now,shall we? haha.

It starts because his people pray.
It keeps on going because his people pray.
It sees breakthroughs and miracles because his people pray.
Nations tremble and earthly establishments fall because his people pray.
It all starts out with a prayer.

With that thought I leave you,some snapshots from the camp for your viewing pleasure. (:


This is supposed to be a rose. HAHA. thankyou team 14 for the support (:



'I dont wanna be' by Yi liang and the band. loveeeeee that song.

Teddy sqaures off with Spongebob :O
Teddy's ours!
Project Run-a-way. haha. okay okay. project runway. (:
Fourth team to arrive out of TWENTY. way to go! :D

STORMcity!;
- 4:28 AM

Alrights…time to squeeze in a quick update before things whoosh by again and im caught up with way too many things to write. then my readers will be enriched through gifford’s weekly essays. (: HAH. that’s either good or bad right? it’s subjective la, I’ll let you decide. haha… id prefer to keep it short and sweet, chop chop curry pok, you dig? right, where were we!

COMMON TESTS!

I thought it was great,even though things just rolled over since programming there’s still reason to be thankful, because I know god’s in full control. What is there to worry about?

‘Therefore I tell you,do not worry about your life,what you will eat or drink;or about your body,what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than the clothes?…Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?’ Matthew 6:25-27

thats not to say we should just throw it all aside,now. trust and complacency are completely different altogether. Complacency says ‘throw it all down, someone’s gon clean up after you’ but trust says ‘god im gonna give it one hell of a shot, it’s all in your hands cos I know you’ve got it all worked out’ and seriously believing that he’s gonna come though for you because you choose to ‘seek first his kingdom and his righteousness’ it aint easy,we’ll give you that. haha. I struggle to stay out of the grey area all the time,don’t we all? haha.but i know things are taking a turn for the better, I feel freedom racing through my veins yet again. (:

STORMcity!;
- 4:19 AM

HEY. im back, im back now. haha. after all this time, after what felt like an excruciating ride through circumstances and emotion,im back. things feel so different,almost as if something came in and swept me clean, washed me over, and now im here, everything's the way it should be,or at least it is,to me. not quite by the world's standards, by the way. ;)

where ive felt defeated im brought back to a promise of victory.

where ive felt vulnerable im strengthened once again, by the spirit of god.

where ive felt like a failure i was assured that all of it could work for a greater good, if id only allow it to.

where ive felt inferior i was reminded of how i was fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of god, and yeah,thats just the way i like it thankyou. :D

where ive seen how things could fall apart just like that, i knew, i knew god didnt build those.

where life seems like a grey area every now and then, i knew i could see white clearer than those who didnt know him could, and now now, the paintbrush's in my hand.


yeah i was broken,only to be established again on grounds that still shake me up, but you know what? im getting closer each time,closer to heaven, and damn it looks good up there,i swear. ;)

STORMcity!;
- 4:40 PM

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