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Monday, April 09, 2007
whooooosa! NEW SKIN. and so it is time to bid farewell to all the late nights up searching.wouldnt say its exactly what ive wanted or set out looking for but there you go, its good nonetheless! heh. of course there's still the issue of space to iron out and everything- im on it man. its gonna look BANGING in no time at all i promise.
:O
hellllllo monday! it doesnt feel like it but tomorrow's my b-day man. oooooosh! :D heh where do i start... its been one hell of a week la!
every second leading right up to TGIF stressed the crap outta me but hey,the lord brought me through and i wanna give thanks for that! haha!id be just about the last person you'd choose to lead games for a crowd of 150 people,yet little did i realise that the absurdity of such a choice,or so it appeared to me-would work out for the greater good of both the people, as well as my co-host and aku! its shit really,when time's working against you and working out the logistics become the least of your problems. cause then you also need to have that chemistry with each other so when the occasion calls for it, you can think on your feet and act accordingly without risking a dip in the 'high' that you went to such great pains to stir up.that we did, promptly. then again there were the hours spent at the laptop, typing away like there's no tomorrow and trying to no avail to come up with that something extra that would give it that ooooMPH we were looking for. fresh out of my rotting days this proved to be a life-threatening task. haha woooopsey =x
haha yeah,and so it was a demoralizing week for us as friday drew closer, that fear in my heart cast a shadow over my spirit and my confidence level plunged to an all-time low.
thursday's rehearsal was like a slap in the face for me, i went home feeling a lil shitty about myself but as i settled down by my bed- tired and fussed, the lord just breathed into me such incredible rest,that as i felt prompted to lose the script there was just this awesome feeling of release-and i felt like i was ready to take on the world. haha. you see,there are always times when i run on empty and end up feeling all crappy cus i got so caught up in that momment that i begin to lose the very essence of who im really running this for. but the lord always brings me back to this word, and so i come on home again,not dispirited, but affirmed.
'...for we know that in all thing god works for the good of those who love him,who have been called according to his purpose...'
Romans 8:28
note that what we perceive to be good may not always be what the lord sees is best for us,and so we often get caught up in that momment and feel all crappy because we don’t see the full picture- what we see is a shit-ass situation and no way to get out of it .but if you could pause for just one sec and capture god’s heart behind your problem, if you were to align your heart with god and trust that something good will come out of this-then you find the peace in surrendering to the lord and the joy in receiving the real blessings he has intended for you all this while.
the lord told me that ‘son,its not about how you’ve prepared, or how much of yourself you have put into this,it really is about me and the reason why you’re doing all this,is so that the hearts of my people will be turned to me and they will be able to rejoice in their salvation because they experienced a god who is real in their lives, and this is how its going to happen-from you.’
the lord convicted me of how id lost the essence of the very event i was planning for all through the week, and even as the committee went into a time of prayer before the event, i repented before the lord and thereafter his spirit flowed freely in me and through me. I don’t know how lisa felt,but I believe she felt the same!because we set our hearts right with god, he is faithful to use us as channels of blessing to the people, through breaking the ice and readying the ground for which his word,word of his unceasing love-could be planted. you and i at tgif know that we had an awesome awesome time.
i know i did. (:
STORMcity!;
- 4:37 PM